There’s No Way Zombies Could Win by Thomas Malafarina
One of the big problems I have with a lot of the zombie genre books and movies is the idea that humanity could be destroyed by flesh eating creatures rising from the dead. For the sake of this discussion to continue, let’s accept the premise that by whatever means, natural, man-made or viral the dead have suddenly begun to get up, stumble around and eat the living. Let’s also assume they are the typical slow-moving, shambling eating machines as depicted in many of what I consider the best zombie literature. Obviously, if they were the fast-paced speed demons depicted say in World War Z, this would be an entirely different discussion.
I don’t believe these slow type zombies could ever take over the earth. Or should say they couldn’t take over the United States. I should point out in defense of the undead, in my Dead Kill zombie book series I do point out that those countries with strict gun control do get over-run by zombies. This is not me taking any pro-gun political stance or anything of that nature. I’m too busy to get involved with such nonsense. This is just a logical assumption and my opinion based on what I know and what I’ve observed in my many years on this planet.
Consider this, in the movie Dawn of The Dead, (the first one — and my favorite) George Romero had a scene that was meant to be satirical, as was the entire movie, where a bunch of red necks were out having a good old time drinking beer and hunting zombies. But think about this for a minute. Many individual states in the United States have more guns per capita than many large foreign countries.
If we are to accept the premise that the dead could rise and eat the living then
you have to realize that most Americans wouldn’t just sit back and become a
main course. It just isn’t how we are wired. We love to shoot stuff. And shooting moving stuff — even slow moving stuff — is much more fun than shooting targets.
I’m neither a gun enthusiast nor a hunter, but many of my closest friends are. So I know they would have a blast, pardon the expression hunting zombies.
In my Dead Kill series the government offers a $100 per zombie bounty to any
undead rendered permanently dead. The name “Dead Kill” itself refers to killing something already determined to be dead. The idea of open season all year round with a hefty bounty attached would easily result in total annihilation of the zombie population.
In my less than scientific opinion, zombies simply wouldn’t have a chance, at
least not in the US. We Americans are a bit too crazy for that.
Thomas M. Malafarina is an author of horror fiction from Berks County, Pennsylvania. To date he has published seven horror novels “What Waits Beneath”, “Burner”, “From The Dark” , “Circle Of Blood”, “Dead Kill Book 1: The Ridge of Death”,”Dead Kill Book 2: The Ridge Of Change” and “Dead Kill Book 3: The Ridge Of War”. He has also published six collections of horror short stories; “Thirteen Deadly Endings”, “Ghost Shadows”, “Undead Living” and most recently “Malaformed Realities Vol. 1, Vol. 2 and Vol. 3”. He has also published a book of often-strange single panel cartoons called “Yes I Smelled It Too; Cartoons For The Slightly Off Center”. All of his books are published through Hellbender Books, an imprint of Sunbury Press. In addition, many of the more than one hundred short stories Thomas has written have appeared in dozens of short story anthologies and e-magazines. Some have been produced and presented for internet podcasts and radio plays as well. Thomas is best known for the twists and surprises in his stories as well as his descriptive, often gory passages. Thomas is also an artist, musician, singer and songwriter. He lives in Western Berks County, Pennsylvania along with his wife JoAnne.
